I feel like I do not trust myself or memory anymore
I won’t go into much detail, but randomly out of nowhere on Monday, I got an intrusive thought about a situation I was never ever worried about in the past, but I stupidly let my thoughts spiral and now I feel like I don’t trust myself or memory anymore. Now I keep thinking of “what if” scenarios even though I know deep deep down my memory is correct. How do you know if something is truly an “ocd thought”?
I’ve found it helpful to notice how i feel when i have an ocd thought. and then if i have another thought that i’m not sure about, if i have the same feeling it’s probably an ocd thought. for me, the thoughts feel really urgent, panicky, and make me not trust myself.
Alexandra Helmreich when I first got the thought I was so anxious but I was like no that’s not true at all, the thought isn’t true, but it’s spiralled so much now. I know it is probably an ocd thought but of course I get hit with “what if it’s not ocd” lol 😞
Kanak Sofat it definitely sounds like an ocd thought if it makes you that anxious. another thing i’ve noticed with ocd thoughts is the desire to solve them right away. ocd wants 100% certainty of everything but that’s impossible. it sounds like you’re ruminating on the thoughts, which is what you would think you’re supposed to do but it’s not helpful with ocd thoughts. i’m not an expert but what has helped me is trying to “reassure” myself but not with anything that is an absolute truth. so that would include even “everything will be okay” or things like that. maybe try “not knowing makes me uncomfortable, but i can handle being uncomfortable”
I hope that was somewhat helpful. have you tried erp?
Alexandra Helmreich that was definitely helpful! Thank you so much, yeah I always try to “solve” the issue in my head, I go over things so many times in my head I don’t even know what’s real anymore because it all feels so real. I asked others for reassurance right away too
I’ve never tried erp! Definitely want to though
Kanak Sofat I do the exact same thing! I think about things so much that I confuse myself and can’t tell what’s real either. So you’re definitely not alone. ERP helped me tons, i definitely recommend it. i’ve also started journaling recently which has helped with asking others for reassurance
I agree with Alexandra! I also found asking someone else if that makes sense? And then hearing it back works to reassure me that it’s just a thought
You feeling better with it ?
Because it is one that will NOT go away. It cause a tremendous amount of anxiety that just seems to escalate the more one has the thought. It is something that is quite distressing and something that is not normal to ones thought processes. It’s intrusive and generally will pop up or get worse when you are experiencing heightened anxiety.
I’ve dealt with OCD for over 58 years. Plus I have a background in psychology. I have a lot of understanding of what OCD is all about. I see it for what it is: an attempt to control the anxiety/the situations causing the anxiety. An attempt to feel better about the cause of the anxiety. And it totally backfires because OCD is, by definition, out-of-control behavior. Which cause more anxiety. Which perpétuâtes thé OCD thoughts and behaviors. It’s the great OCD lie. You have less and less control as time goes on in spite of ones desperation to have that control.
Susan Currie wow that’s so true! The thought came out of the blue and now it’s stuck with me, I keep ruminating as a way to “feel better” and get “answers” for the thought but I just keep finding more stuff to be anxious about that I can’t trust my memory or myself anymore
My doc said as long as you don’t act on anything and after all these years, never did. My brain needed more fats-no more intrusive thoughts now.