My anxiety as I look back started when I was about 5 years old

So hard to talk about GAD

I have never told my story before. I had a bitter sweet childhood. Great family but my mother was not very stable. There were times in my early years that I was not protected enough. I remember being in elementary school and I came to a point that I would stay away from my friends at recess and lunch. Kind of hide in a corner. Stay to myself. Then we did alot of moves with my mom. I was embarrassed and confused as a young child. I never felt like I fit in. I worried àlot. My mother and I argued alot. My anxiety as I look back started when I was about 5 years old. Many things happened through my life. I am now 48 years old. 6 1/2 years ago, my mom was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer. I took 4 months off work to be with her. After 3 months she was not feeling well. We went to emergency. They sent her home. Two hours later my aunt and I were preforming CPR on her. She didn’t make it. So many more things going on. So hard to talk about it.

Discussion

Tanya Nielsen
I feel like I didn’t do enough for her

Colleen Marie
Tanya Nielsen I’m sure you did everything you were capable of doing. You were there for her, took care of her, made sure she wasn’t alone. It isn’t easy being a caregiver but you did it. You are a good daughter.

Colleen Marie
I’m sorry. That is a lot to deal with and it’s no wonder you have anxiety. Are you seeing a therapist at all? My childhood was horrendous and therapy is helping a bit. I’m sorry you lost your Mom like that…it’s heartbreaking.

Tanya Nielsen
Colleen Marie I have not seen a therapist yet. I did make appointments after it happened but I canceled them. To be honest, I felt like they could not help me. They dont know me. This is the first time I am talking about this in the openly. It is great to be a part of this group

Colleen Marie
Tanya Nielsen I can understand that. I felt the same way. Maybe you can try again when you feel stronger. Either way I’m glad you are in this group. Anxiety is so horrible and makes you feel hopeless but not many people understand. It makes me feel alone. I hope this group makes you feel less alone.

Tanya Nielsen
Colleen Marie thank you and lots of hugs to you

Colleen Marie
Tanya Nielsen You too!